I am not yet born; O hear me.
The world is an ugly place,
It scares me.
I am not yet born; encourage me.
A mother to love and guide me,
Through difficult times,
To shield and protect me.
I am not yet born; prepare me.
For the good and bad that awaits me,
For the many wonders of the Almighty,
The greed and selfishness of society.
I am not yet born; release me.
Into a world that shall provoke me,
Mistakes I shall make and experiences I shall gain,
To teach me.
I am not yet born; O scold me.
For the evil that lies within me,
The resentment and wrath released by me.
I am not yet born; fulfill me.
With dreams and aspirations
To propel me.
I long for this world that awaits me,
And I pray that the good Lord guides me.
08/2005
©AGK
2009/02/21
View from My Balcony
I stand here looking out from my balcony,
I stand here watching the world.
I watch as the sun lights up the cloudless sky above,
I watch as the children play in the streets below.
The sunshine that brings laughter, smiles and fun;
The sunshine that brings happiness.
I feel my world shake as I hear the thunder boom through the land,
The light blue, cloudless sky now dark.
The lightning flashing through the sky,
Like the searing pain in my heart.
I look below to everyone running for shelter,
Screaming back at the tormenting noise in the sky.
Here I stand, high on my balcony,
Watching these naïve, judgemental people.
I watch how they smile when they see 18 year old David serenading 16 year old Anne,
I watch how they frown when they see two 20 year old men holding hands while walking in the park,
Or two 20 year old women kissing while sitting under a tree, enjoying their picnic like everyone else.
I watch and wonder what our little children will turn out to be.
Will they be open minded and accepting of others,
Or will they be amongst those who frown upon them,
Because they are the few who are not afraid of who they really are;
Not afraid of showing the world their true colours.
I stand here remembering how I was once judged.
Judged for telling people who I am – allowing them to see
I stand here remembering being pushed outside in the pouring rain;
The fence in front of me, keeping me from everyone else,
Jailed within my own body, own conscience.
People shouting and pointing at the outcast behind the fence,
Dogs barking ferociously at something they do not recognise.
Will the judging ever stop?
Will these naïve people ever realise that I am just a reflection of them;
Perhaps that is why they hate me yet I do not hate myself.
Or will I just be expected to stand here on my balcony,
Searching the turbulent sky,
And allow the rain to come in over my face,
And wash away my shame?
07/01/2007
©AGK
I stand here watching the world.
I watch as the sun lights up the cloudless sky above,
I watch as the children play in the streets below.
The sunshine that brings laughter, smiles and fun;
The sunshine that brings happiness.
I feel my world shake as I hear the thunder boom through the land,
The light blue, cloudless sky now dark.
The lightning flashing through the sky,
Like the searing pain in my heart.
I look below to everyone running for shelter,
Screaming back at the tormenting noise in the sky.
Here I stand, high on my balcony,
Watching these naïve, judgemental people.
I watch how they smile when they see 18 year old David serenading 16 year old Anne,
I watch how they frown when they see two 20 year old men holding hands while walking in the park,
Or two 20 year old women kissing while sitting under a tree, enjoying their picnic like everyone else.
I watch and wonder what our little children will turn out to be.
Will they be open minded and accepting of others,
Or will they be amongst those who frown upon them,
Because they are the few who are not afraid of who they really are;
Not afraid of showing the world their true colours.
I stand here remembering how I was once judged.
Judged for telling people who I am – allowing them to see
I stand here remembering being pushed outside in the pouring rain;
The fence in front of me, keeping me from everyone else,
Jailed within my own body, own conscience.
People shouting and pointing at the outcast behind the fence,
Dogs barking ferociously at something they do not recognise.
Will the judging ever stop?
Will these naïve people ever realise that I am just a reflection of them;
Perhaps that is why they hate me yet I do not hate myself.
Or will I just be expected to stand here on my balcony,
Searching the turbulent sky,
And allow the rain to come in over my face,
And wash away my shame?
07/01/2007
©AGK
Time Bring with It
20/05/2006
Time - the one thing no one can run away from, but it can run away from you.
Time - the one thing that is limited yet unlimited.
Time - the one thing we moan we have too little of or groan we have too much.
Time - something we either take advantage of or let it pass us by slowly...very slowly, as if watching the sand fall through the hourglass;
Feeling every second;
Watching as it slips away.
Time brings peace, contentment, experience, knowledge and wisdom.
Time brings unhappiness, distress, anxiety, fear, regrets and misfortune.
I often wonder why time is time.
Why is it called time?
Why should it be so important?
No one understands.
No one realises.
Time has brought me pain, anger, suffering and disgust.
Time has robbed me of what was due to me...what I didn't have but everyone else had.
Time forced maturity upon me.
It opened my eyes to the big, bad world.
Young, I was, sweet and naive.
Deprived - it was taken away from me.
Don't touch me!
You have no right.
I have my space as all people do.
Who are you to invade that?
Who are you to come into my space, my place and protective zone?
You…are...no one.
You are not special.
Time has shown me that.
Time has brought with it insight, clarity and understanding.
Trust no one.
Trust yourself.
Wait, wait! Wait for the answers; time will bring them.
I waited.
I am waiting.
How much longer?
When do I get them?
When does it all end?
Trauma…fear.
Taunted and haunted by the dreadful past.
The past - time has passed.
I wish upon my future.
I wonder with curiosity.
I wait with anticipation.
Does time change what the future holds based on what the past held or what today brings?
Is anything guaranteed in life...except death?
Death…
Time brings with it death.
Death is guaranteed.
Why is only death guaranteed?
It was once said and today I still ask this question: "Why is it that when we are born, we are crying and everyone else is smiling but when we die, we are smiling and everyone else is crying?"
I wonder...
Should it not be reversed?
Should we all not cry to be born into this tainted world?
Should we all not smile to know we are leaving hell and going to heaven?
"Live life to the full."
Should I bungee jump?
Climb Everest?
Is that living life to the full?
Is life on earth?
"Live life to the full."
Care for those that don't always care about you.
Be sincere though at times, they are not sincere to you.
Be a friend - a person there through the good and bad;
A person who does not judge others.
A person who will keep the same perception of you irrespective of what cards life has dealt you.
Love your neighbour.
Why should I love my neighbour if he doesn't love me?
God loves my neighbour, therefore, I will too.
I hate time.
I'm lost, bewildered, confused and muddled up within the complications of my own life - unaware of where I am going and why.
Going forward, I am, but only because time is taking me there;
Not because I know where I am going.
I lack direction;
Or will it come with time?
©AGK
Time - the one thing no one can run away from, but it can run away from you.
Time - the one thing that is limited yet unlimited.
Time - the one thing we moan we have too little of or groan we have too much.
Time - something we either take advantage of or let it pass us by slowly...very slowly, as if watching the sand fall through the hourglass;
Feeling every second;
Watching as it slips away.
Time brings peace, contentment, experience, knowledge and wisdom.
Time brings unhappiness, distress, anxiety, fear, regrets and misfortune.
I often wonder why time is time.
Why is it called time?
Why should it be so important?
No one understands.
No one realises.
Time has brought me pain, anger, suffering and disgust.
Time has robbed me of what was due to me...what I didn't have but everyone else had.
Time forced maturity upon me.
It opened my eyes to the big, bad world.
Young, I was, sweet and naive.
Deprived - it was taken away from me.
Don't touch me!
You have no right.
I have my space as all people do.
Who are you to invade that?
Who are you to come into my space, my place and protective zone?
You…are...no one.
You are not special.
Time has shown me that.
Time has brought with it insight, clarity and understanding.
Trust no one.
Trust yourself.
Wait, wait! Wait for the answers; time will bring them.
I waited.
I am waiting.
How much longer?
When do I get them?
When does it all end?
Trauma…fear.
Taunted and haunted by the dreadful past.
The past - time has passed.
I wish upon my future.
I wonder with curiosity.
I wait with anticipation.
Does time change what the future holds based on what the past held or what today brings?
Is anything guaranteed in life...except death?
Death…
Time brings with it death.
Death is guaranteed.
Why is only death guaranteed?
It was once said and today I still ask this question: "Why is it that when we are born, we are crying and everyone else is smiling but when we die, we are smiling and everyone else is crying?"
I wonder...
Should it not be reversed?
Should we all not cry to be born into this tainted world?
Should we all not smile to know we are leaving hell and going to heaven?
"Live life to the full."
Should I bungee jump?
Climb Everest?
Is that living life to the full?
Is life on earth?
"Live life to the full."
Care for those that don't always care about you.
Be sincere though at times, they are not sincere to you.
Be a friend - a person there through the good and bad;
A person who does not judge others.
A person who will keep the same perception of you irrespective of what cards life has dealt you.
Love your neighbour.
Why should I love my neighbour if he doesn't love me?
God loves my neighbour, therefore, I will too.
I hate time.
I'm lost, bewildered, confused and muddled up within the complications of my own life - unaware of where I am going and why.
Going forward, I am, but only because time is taking me there;
Not because I know where I am going.
I lack direction;
Or will it come with time?
©AGK
Talking Eyes
29/08/2006
Looking into Her Eyes, I see love,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see hate,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see passion;
I wonder, is it passionate love or hate?
Looking into Her Eyes, I see pain,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see anger,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see suffering;
I wonder, will Her anguish ever end?
When I look at Her, I see all of Her,
When I look into Her Eyes, I look into Her soul;
I see everything.
From a distance or near-by, I would recognize Her Eyes,
From a distance or near-by, my heart would call upon Hers.
Her Eyes tell a story of triumph and pain,
Her Eyes write of fiction, legend and myth,
Her Eyes have experienced it all, seen it all;
Her Eyes tell a story.
Her Eyes give character,
Her Eyes give depth,
Her Eyes give meaning, to the heart I once kept.
The colour – deep and dark,
Reflecting Her feelings and thoughts;
Thoughts - changing all the time,
Changing like the unpredictable sea,
Changing like the unexpected winds.
She need not speak,
She need not whisper a word,
Her Eyes talk.
Whether anguish or joy;
Her Eyes talk.
I know Her, because I know those eyes.
I know Her, because I recognize the way Her Eyes talk to mine,
The way Her Eyes convey Her inner most intimate thoughts and feelings;
The way They communicate with mine.
She need not speak,
She need not whisper a word,
Looking into Her Eyes is when I go weak,
When I can not speak,
When nothing is heard,
And nothing is said.
Our Eyes lock, nothing to break the gaze;
Our Eyes lock, our hearts talk, our souls hold hands and our spirits dance together.
Her Eyes and My Eyes,
Our Eyes will talk forever.
©AGK
Looking into Her Eyes, I see love,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see hate,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see passion;
I wonder, is it passionate love or hate?
Looking into Her Eyes, I see pain,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see anger,
Looking into Her Eyes, I see suffering;
I wonder, will Her anguish ever end?
When I look at Her, I see all of Her,
When I look into Her Eyes, I look into Her soul;
I see everything.
From a distance or near-by, I would recognize Her Eyes,
From a distance or near-by, my heart would call upon Hers.
Her Eyes tell a story of triumph and pain,
Her Eyes write of fiction, legend and myth,
Her Eyes have experienced it all, seen it all;
Her Eyes tell a story.
Her Eyes give character,
Her Eyes give depth,
Her Eyes give meaning, to the heart I once kept.
The colour – deep and dark,
Reflecting Her feelings and thoughts;
Thoughts - changing all the time,
Changing like the unpredictable sea,
Changing like the unexpected winds.
She need not speak,
She need not whisper a word,
Her Eyes talk.
Whether anguish or joy;
Her Eyes talk.
I know Her, because I know those eyes.
I know Her, because I recognize the way Her Eyes talk to mine,
The way Her Eyes convey Her inner most intimate thoughts and feelings;
The way They communicate with mine.
She need not speak,
She need not whisper a word,
Looking into Her Eyes is when I go weak,
When I can not speak,
When nothing is heard,
And nothing is said.
Our Eyes lock, nothing to break the gaze;
Our Eyes lock, our hearts talk, our souls hold hands and our spirits dance together.
Her Eyes and My Eyes,
Our Eyes will talk forever.
©AGK
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